“is that the baby’s foot?” asked four year old dhweeja after pointing to the rise atop natalie’s pregnant belly caused by an inverted belly button.

i hate people who encourage me to spend hundreds of dollars when they won’t spend tens.

its easy to forget how drastic a change pregnancy is to a body when your wife doesn’t complain any or get sick.

i’m five foot ten, one-hundred fifty-five pounds and except for a little extra junk in the trunk have just about the quintessential build, and still, i can’t find a pair of levis to fit me.

as much as we loved playing little league baseball the whole team still looked forward to the end of the game when the coaches would pass out free coupons for us to spend on ice cream and candy at the refreshment stand – there should be a similar custom for adults at the end of a work day.

window shopping is like a lap dance and i’m not interested in either unless i’m going home with something.

i’m pretty happy listening to a wide variety of music, say black sabbath or barbara streisand or bob marley to name a few, but the only band i never skip past when scanning the radio dial is pink floyd.

a friend at work yesterday told me that he will only see movies that also sell toys at burger king.

i took a vacation from the news last week and i can honestly report that the guilt associated with a lack of knowledge in world events was more than offset by the bliss of ignorance.