i love it when people talk about the clarity of george w. bush because it validates the truth of the expression “the more you know, the more you realize what you don’t know”.

-and i promise i’ll try not to complain about this moron for the next four years but i’m thinking it may be difficult…

the best way to guarantee i don’t read your web content is to attempt to resize my browser window.

…and before you go getting all silly, yes it does occur sometimes at non-porn sites.

the good news about being in the worse shape of my life is how hard i’ve had to work at get there…

the next time someone on the other end of a customer service call with a heavy accent introduces themselves as john or something equally preposterous, i’m going to respond “hi john, my name is deepak”

i thought you were the professor. -said to me by someone not nearly young enough to think i was that old.

for me, i knew i became affluent when i started buying second and thirds of stuff i already had firsts of.

for those curious about the wrath exacted by the juju gods, it mostly seems to manifest itself in the way of facial acne.

i am becoming more and more embarrassed and saddened by what appears to be the majority opinion in my country.

i almost couldn’t sleep last night i was so anxious to get to the poles and vote george w. bush out of the white house…

in our ever increasing effort to combat terrorism on the homeland, i witnessed a senior citizen confined to a wheel chair being molested by a tsa agent attempting to remove his podiatric shoes in order to comply with the new obligatory ‘leave no shoe unscoured’ program. count me feeling more secure.