my next luxury purchase is going to be a speaker system that can handle playing enigma’s “eyes of truth” at full volume with no distortion.

what am i talking about, that isn’t a luxury purchase, that is a necessity.

watching the health care debate taking place in “town hall” meetings across the country makes me glad to not be a politician so i can say things like “a thinning of the herd would do this country a great deal of good”.

apparently, through nature or nurture i’ve passed this sentiment on to my children because during dinner my children asked what it would be like if we were the only family left on earth.

i listed a number of disadvantages.

then my five year old said “but there would be more stuff for us”.

and my three year old added “we could live in any house we wanted to”.

to avoid being the last one on the train, here is my foray in to taking liberties with the obama message of hope…

bill maher put together this excellent contrast of romantic stylings from south carolina governor mark sanford and former florida representative mark foley:

sanford: you are special and unique and fabulous in a whole host a ways.

foley: did you spank it this weekend?

sanford: you opened up a new chapter last week wherein i was happy and content just being.

foley: i like steam rooms.

sanford: have you been told lately how warm your eyes are and how they softly glow with the special nature of your soul?

foley: i have totally stiff wood now.

sanford: my heart cries out for you: your voice, your body, the touch of your lips, the touch of your finger tips an even deeper connection to your soul

foley: is your little guy limp, or growing?

sanford: you have a particular grace and calm that i adore… a level of sophistication that is so fitting with your beauty.

foley: get a ruler and measure it for me.

these were extracted from real email and text messages, once again fact is stranger than fiction…

ethan’s kindergarten sent us a letter with the events and prerequisites that need to be completed before he can begin public schooling at the end of this month.

the list isn’t short and even includes a teacher visit to our home.

given my history with public education and that no feldt in the history of time has revered authority for authority’s sake, its with muddled feelings i prepare my son to enter that world…